Prince Charming

When I was little my mom told me stories.
Princes and almighty knights.
When I was little, I expected this to be true
That.
The princes and knights my mom would talk about will come.
Come and would change,
Change, my life.

When I grew up I ended up losing that,
That expectation
The expectation that the almighty prince or knight will come.
I only met the devilish dark princes and knights.
they,
They made me lose faith in the stories
The stories my mom used to tell.

Then I met you,
When all expectations and all interest was gone.
Showing me that the stories,
The stories my mom once had told.
About that Prince and that Knight.

Where about you.

When is it time to Let it go?

So there will be a time in your life when you know that you need to let go of someone, but can’t. It doesn’t matter what they do or what they say you just can’t tell them to walk out of your life even when they tell you they don’t want to be with you anymore and give mixed signals.

I’ve been there, I gave all I had to this one person who I thought I’d end up with. It started out like a modern fairytale, like really. Meeting someone through some app and then you talk more and notice you walked past each other.

Thinking about that person once every day changed into every second, talking to each other from the moment we woke up till sleeping time. There were no other people that sparkled my interest as he did, make me laugh or be happy with myself.

Soon things changed, you miscommunicate wrong and there is the first fight which was forgiven. Friends started to put their noses where it didn’t belong and made us argue about it several times, with the question:

“Are you being in a serious relationship with me?”

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Yeah..it isn’t

There I was picking the pieces together.. Trying to make things work, make us work. There wasn’t a second I doubted we wouldn’t work because this feeling wasn’t a regular one.

Even when the ex knocked on the door in the de middle of the night telling that she had a fight with their parents ( traveled a long ass time to the house). I trusted in us, that us was stronger and that everything would be okay.

Still… I wasn’t able to let go, even though everyone told me I should because this, THIS situation wasn’t what I deserved.

I believed in us.

That person didn’t want to look me into the face nor want to see me in general.

I still couldn’t let go.

I was told sweet words, messing with my head, I asked what was the future where do we want to go?

or is we just me?

the answer constantly coming back was a plain

” I don’t know…”

Yet, I still couldn’t let go…

The frustration still built I took my distance trying to force myself to let go.
It worked as minutes and hours passed by I started to forget only to be dragged back down when a message was sent with the text.

” I love you and I miss you so”

Saying it’s okay to come and see me, say hello if the person had missed me so.

That person said ” No”

Knowing the feeling of reject and pain, I asked the same question.
I asked what was the future where do we want to go, or is we just me?

only getting the same old

“I don’t know..”

This time, frustration built up, anger was filled emotions going berserk and feeling messed up.

I was kept waiting on the sideline when I was needed or the person just needed sweet words. I pushed myself, for real, to finally let go.

I let that person go.

I felt miserable but as the hours, days and weeks passed by I finally had let go.

So when is really the time to let go?

I think a person should let go when they tried everything you could possibly do to save it. If all those things didn’t work, it’s time to let go.

That was one of the best things that happend in my life, I finally got the courage to let go of something i couldn’t change anymore.

Because if the person doesn’t know the worth of your tears.
The person isn’t worth you.

I’m an average 20-year old with 99 problems.
Letting go isn’t one of them anymore

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Be A Preacher Not a Judge.

Let me be clear. I understand very little, least of all the things happening close to me. We humans are very interesting creatures. Our brains all work the same yet don’t see or feel the same.

How is it than that:
We judge people for judging people because judging people is wrong?

Oh wait I am judging you, Sorry.

We want to fit in, yet we want to stand out and when someone else does stand out there either asking for attention or made so insecure that they turn into “regular” people and lose themselves. People judge on different things like; race, religion, sex and appearance.

Let’s start with an example, think of it a dark skinned person walking in a bad neighborhood he doesn’t have nice clothing just decent ones. Our brain automatically fills the empty pieces together without us noticing. It remembers a dark skinned person, bad neighborhood and remembers things said on the news and the first thing you’ll brain will say; he must be a drug dealer or a thief. It’s not your fault it’s just things that our unconsciousness remembers and pieces together. Little do you know the man is a volunteer in different housings to help elderly people do grocery shopping and cleans their houses.

The same goes for a man wearing a djellaba and has a beard, funny enough this happened to me the other day while working. A man came into the store looking like this and a few minutes after I hear a colleague says: oh there you must have a terrorist again without even talking or looking closely at the man. My colleague her conscious thought he might scream Allahu akbar and suicide bomb us. I told her she should help him and see for herself if how she judged him would be as he really is. She did, little did she expect him to be such a nice and polite man with such wisdom and love for the country we’re living in. That day she helped the man and retold me the wisdom he had told her.

It’s saddening to notice, but this happens a lot. Like when I was working at one my previous workplaces a man who looked homeless came into the store to look at the leather jackets that were stalled out. I asked the man if he would like to have a cup of coffee and he did. After I had given the man his cup of coffee my boss asked me not to give homeless people coffee otherwise they would constantly come back and not buy anything. Little did my boss expect the man to buy two leather jackets and a jeans.

Guess we Really Don’t know people as much as we think..

In the end it doesn’t matter what you do or how you act, you’ll always be judged without people knowing you and honestly, that says more about them than it says about you. It is okay, don’t let these kind of people make you, who is perfect with those beautiful imperfections that makes you stand out and not fit in be one of the “regular” people.

Don’t be like the rest of them darling, and I am not saying I do not judge we’re humans and judging is part of our nature, but you are able to change the way you judge. Some people call me naive because of it, but I look at someone with a blank page to give every person an equal chance of filling it with the facts that make them de individual that they are. Based on the facts wrote down for me I judge them. I let them individualize themselves for me, let them tell their story. Just like I don’t want to be seen as a person who is part of a big group of people with their typical characteristics. These characteristics are a part of me, but they do not only define well, ME. Same goes for the way I dress and how much make-up I’ve got on.

Just continue walking, please and never ever return

In the end I think all we should worry about is what our loved ones think about you, sometimes it even doesn’t matter what they think. We shouldn’t be brought down by the thoughts of a stranger. The more one realizes that the happier you’ll be in life, because who the fuck are they for treating you like that without knowing the inside of you. Next time someone does judge you for things that don’t define you raise your hand and give them the finger.

I’m an average 19-year old with 99 problems 
and judging people isn’t one of them

How much does an Ice bear weight?

ENOUGH TO BREAK THE ICE!

This time’s subject evolves around pickup lines! First things first what is a pickup line? Let’s skip the dictionary and go straight to Wikipedia.

wiki says:

“A pick-up line or chat-up line is a conversation opener with the intent of engaging an unfamiliar person for romance or dating. Overt and sometimes humorous displays of romantic interest, pick-up lines advertise the wit of their speakers to their target listeners.

They are most commonly used by men who pick up women.”

What I found interesting is that Wikipedia refers to mostly guys using them and women not so much (sadly I am one of the few who does and gets laughed at horribly). So what do woman/girls tend to do? I asked my wise mother. She answered with that woman don’t use words, but gestures, like smiling, winking and such. Men are not that well in non-verbal talk (mom’s words, not mine). This did make me think about a few times, once I was walking with my cousin and a girl walked in our direction and my cousin just walked up to her and said:

Is that a ladder in your tights or the stairway to heaven?”

She giggled and continued walking and I just stood there with my mouth open not understanding what just happened. I just couldn’t understand that you just walk up to a person on the middle of the street and say that. I was mind struck and of course, my cousin continued walking proudly like some idiot. Like, What is wrong with you? how can you be proud of that and on top of that feel like you totally OWNED it? A man his mind sure is a mystery itself..

But, that aside let us go fast forward to my first year of high school, some random guy came up to me saying:

“Do you have a robe because I keep on falling in those empty eyes of you.”

Like honestly? How can this be a pick up line? he’s totally humiliating me and making fun of me because of course he had to say such a thing with other people around, okay I can laugh about it now and let it go, but at that moment I just wanted to squawk those eyes out of his  sockets

Pick up lines SHOULD most of all be funny. I don’t think you have to use them to be able to strike up a girl or a guy, I mean if you want to make the person laugh pickup lines can be a good way to break the ice. ( without a big polar bear, hopefully..?) What I would recommend is just to smile at the person a few times and that will work as well ( don’t be stupid as I am and take risks). A smile is the best way to attract someone’s attention( and everyone has a beautiful smile!) and show them you’re interested without any bad pickup lines that will make you screw up big time (As I said don’t be like me and take to many risks, avoid awkward situations).

SOO let’s go through the net. I looked up some pick up lines on the internet and I couldn’t stop laughing. Honestly I would be more interested in the geeky ones than in normal ones, because I am a sucker when it comes to geeky guys -sigh-

Let me list a few that stood out to me:

”You must be the square root of 2 because I feel irrational around you.” (math suddenly became more interesting)

”Hey baby are you an angel? Cause I am afraid you’re going to kill me when I close my eyes.” ( Hands up for doctor who<3)

”I wish I was an ion so I could form an exothermic bond with you”. ( I am a Life science student so couldn’t help but like this one.)

”I am a seeker are you my golden snitch? ”(Harry Potter how could we not let him catch us.)

”R4 is red, R2 is blue. If I was the force I’d be with you.” (this is one my best friend has used quite often.)

“beards can red, blades can glow blue, there is only one precious and that must be you.” (How can I not put in a lord of the rings pick up line?)

“Are you a giant flashing signal of a bat, cause I’m really drawn to you.” (Oh, batman stop it)

”I am not staring at your boobs, I am staring at your heart.” (yeah sure keep on trying)

”Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.” (who the hell is going to sit on a freaking pile of sugar? COME ON)

”Forget about Spiderman, Superman, and Batman. I’ll be your man.” ( no, sorry I still rather have the Batman one.)

”If you were a vegetable you’d be a cute-cumber” ( Okay, Okay this one is quite funny)

”Are you a Pikachu? Because you are shockingly beautiful ”(This could actually work! It’s geeky it’s sweet ,this one is a yes to me!)

 

So, here you have them, some of the pickup lines that stood out to me. I bet there are a lot funnier or better ones. Feel free to share some of the pickup lines YOU thought was funny or used. In the end, pickup lines will always be a way of trying to be funny. So we better just laugh them off and feel special. If someone grabbing all the guts he/she has to come up to you and try them out. I would see it more as a compliment than something that would put me down. I mean someone wants to strike up a conversation with you so bad that he or she is using pick up lines to make that happen. That’s pretty cute, sweet and charming 🙂 ( unless he or she uses dirty ones.. then it’s just a one night stand call, just saying)

I am an average 18-year-old with 99 problems and this post contains none of them

Walls Around The Soul.

We all have felt that moment, that moment when you feel like someone is getting into your safety zone. 1
Someone does not accept the way you are or they hurt you and make you build a wall.

Some people try, try hard to be themself behind these walls.
A long time ago I was one of them.
Not confident
Not strong
Not knowing whats going on.

So this poem I wrote it for the people out there
who are struggling, struggling with themself.

My message today:

Stay strong and be who you are.
Be noticed. Noticed by your own charm. 

Continue reading

Friends? For ever?

There have been many things I had to learn the hard way, but there is one thing I just never seem to learn:

Picking the right friends. 

I am the kind of girl that, when we’re friends, is likely to do anything she can to keep you, as my friend, happy. I would help you as much as I possibly could. I’d even go so far as to take you everywhere I go with my family, because that’s fun, right? That’s what friends do, right? Having fun with each other and make memories together so that later on we can have good things to reminiscence about.  These things all make it easy for people to take advantage of me, and they more often than not do.

Every. Time. Again.  Continue reading

Friday the 13th

I’ve always been the kind of person who did absolutely not believe in Friday the 13th, but yesterday sure took it’s toll on me and made me think about it. And no, I still think its a coincidence and that it has nothing to do with that particular  day…

I think, I hope..

It all started with a wake up call at 9:00 am from my mentor, because what is a better way to wake up? It’s getting better: she said I had to be at school in a hour to apply for my redo and, if I won’t make it I will have failed and inevitably be kicked off this school.

Good morning to you too.. Continue reading